By Shannon Hunter
This article was originally published on October 19, 2012
I think the worst time to be single is when you’re feeling sick, when all you want in the world is for someone to bring you soup, take care of you and love you regardless of your clown nose and fevered rants. When you’re sick it feels almost impossible to be the strong, fearless and independent lady that you are.
This week, I’ve been feeling pretty sick. I’ve spent a lot of time in my favourite VS Pink sweats, I haven’t bothered to put on makeup and I’m pretty sure I now own stock in the ginger ale market. Having only dated for a month, I really didn’t expect much from Mr. Unexpected, but he’s been there for me every night this week without question. He’s delivered take out when I didn’t want to leave the house, he’s watched countless episodes of the bad TV that I love, and he has not complained once.
I wouldn’t call him a boyfriend, not yet, but he certainly acts like one when I need him to. There is a quote that I’ve seen passed around on Facebook countless times:
Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep… wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you’re just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you…. The one who turns to his friends and says, “that’s her.”
Mr. Unexpected is the kind of guy who walks into my room when I’m clutching my Sonic doll, clad in a hoodie and my sweats and proceeds to tell me that I look adorable: “like a cute hooded bandit.” He doesn’t care that I’m not wearing makeup this week; he doesn’t care that I refuse to put on real clothing and he doesn’t mind that all I feel like doing is sleeping and trying to get healthy.
Any boy who is willing to sleep next to you for comfort when he knows full well that sex isn’t even on the table is a boy worth keeping around. Sex is of course an important element of any relationship but, the real test comes when you take the sex away. Does he stick around? Is he still there when you look nothing like the beautiful woman he fell for? Is he willing to be your safety blanket when you feel weak? Does he see all of you instead of the made-up version of yourself that you present to the world? If he is, then maybe that quote is right, maybe it’s time to stop accepting good enough and start demanding excellence; if you wouldn’t recommend him to a friend then he isn’t worth your time.
While I may not have picked Mr. Unexpected for myself; he’s not my type not even a little, but, he cares about me in ways that I had forgotten were possible. And, when it comes down to it, who doesn’t want a boy who will lie in bed with you and watch Vampire Diaries all day?